Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
Adventure
I was thinking about the word adventure last week. My generation almost invariably uses the word "adventure" to mean "fun time!" As in, "We're going on a road-trip adventure to Colorado!" or "We're having a spring break adventure!" I was wondering why my life had stopped feeling like an adventure (wedding planning, along with my job and some other things, has been in a rough patch the past few weeks), when one of my favorite songs came on the radio: Steven Curtis Chapman's "The Great Adventure."
Here are the lyrics to the bridge:
We'll travel over, over mountains so high
We'll go through valleys below
Still through it all we'll find that
This is the greatest journey that the human heart will ever see
The love of God will take us far beyond our wildest dreams
When you think about it, it's the valleys that make something truly an adventure. I mean, think of the classic adventure stories: Robin Hood, Treasure Island, Star Wars! Every hero (I'm sorry, readers, that I didn't choose any stories with heroines...blame the literary canon) goes through rough patches and awful experiences. Robin Hood was an outlaw! He narrowly escaped execution, and had to watch Maid Marian be wooed by Prince John. We may romanticize Robin Hood's story, but really, how fun do you think living in the woods and constantly fearing for your life could be?
Jim Hawkins was betrayed by his best friend (because, in the book, he doesn't have cute Muppet friends to sing with). He saw friends die in front of him. Luke Skywalker also saw friends die, PLUS he had to deal with his dad being the Stalin of the galaxy. And Luke's life wasn't actually that great to begin with.
Despite all these setbacks and hardships, all of our heroes had a happy ending. Robin Hood got the girl, King Richard came back and deposed Prince John, and they all lived happily ever after. Jim Hawkins was too young to get any girl, but he did find the treasure and return safely to his mom. Luke Skywalker didn't get the girl (because, ew), but he triumphed over evil and saved the day!
I guess the point is, my life still is an adventure. This is just the valley of adventure, not the mountaintop. It doesn't necessarily make it easier to be in the valley, knowing that I'll end up on the moutaintop; but you know, I have assurance that my adventure is going to have the best happy ending possible. My adventure--of wedding planning specifically, and of life in general--may be a little valley-ish right now, but I also know that my adventure is happening within God's will.
I know that I am supposed to marry Robert, so whatever happens along the way to actually getting married to him, it'll turn out well because I'm acting within God's will. Like the song says, the love of God will take me far beyond my wildest dreams.
Here are the lyrics to the bridge:
We'll travel over, over mountains so high
We'll go through valleys below
Still through it all we'll find that
This is the greatest journey that the human heart will ever see
The love of God will take us far beyond our wildest dreams
When you think about it, it's the valleys that make something truly an adventure. I mean, think of the classic adventure stories: Robin Hood, Treasure Island, Star Wars! Every hero (I'm sorry, readers, that I didn't choose any stories with heroines...blame the literary canon) goes through rough patches and awful experiences. Robin Hood was an outlaw! He narrowly escaped execution, and had to watch Maid Marian be wooed by Prince John. We may romanticize Robin Hood's story, but really, how fun do you think living in the woods and constantly fearing for your life could be?
Jim Hawkins was betrayed by his best friend (because, in the book, he doesn't have cute Muppet friends to sing with). He saw friends die in front of him. Luke Skywalker also saw friends die, PLUS he had to deal with his dad being the Stalin of the galaxy. And Luke's life wasn't actually that great to begin with.
Despite all these setbacks and hardships, all of our heroes had a happy ending. Robin Hood got the girl, King Richard came back and deposed Prince John, and they all lived happily ever after. Jim Hawkins was too young to get any girl, but he did find the treasure and return safely to his mom. Luke Skywalker didn't get the girl (because, ew), but he triumphed over evil and saved the day!
I guess the point is, my life still is an adventure. This is just the valley of adventure, not the mountaintop. It doesn't necessarily make it easier to be in the valley, knowing that I'll end up on the moutaintop; but you know, I have assurance that my adventure is going to have the best happy ending possible. My adventure--of wedding planning specifically, and of life in general--may be a little valley-ish right now, but I also know that my adventure is happening within God's will.
I know that I am supposed to marry Robert, so whatever happens along the way to actually getting married to him, it'll turn out well because I'm acting within God's will. Like the song says, the love of God will take me far beyond my wildest dreams.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Robert's a loop
Last night at a wedding, I was talking to a friend about the future, and mentioned that Robert's and my plans might change "if God throws us for the loop." Hence the title of this post. In my first post about the wedding, I mentioned that no one is more surprised about this event than me, and promised to explain it eventually. So here goes!
I went to William Jewell College, a place lovingly known for distributing MR and MRS degrees. Jewell's tiny, so people's love lives are well-known to everyone, and pretty much everyone assumes that, if you date someone while at Jewell (whether or not s/he goes to Jewell, too), you'll marry them pretty quickly after graduation. I have many friends who prove this assumption correct (four of them are in our wedding party...), and also many more friends who prove this assumption wrong. But, more or less, Jewell's the place where you are expected to meet your spouse-to-be.
Despite this tradition/assumption/folklore, I didn't expect to meet The One while at Jewell. I never really saw myself as a get-married-young type, and I didn't have much patience for dating. Plus, the ratio of guys-to-girls at Jewell when I started was 1-3, and pretty much all of the good ones were taken. I dated a bit in college, but nothing lasted very long and that was fine by me!
At least, that's what I told myself. But deep down...I hate to admit it, but it's true...deep down, I wanted a relationship. I didn't want casual dating, I wanted a commitment to someone who would make me a better person. I, quite frankly, obsessed over a few guys while in college, convinced that they were The One God had for me, and wondering why the relationship wasn't happening. I was very happy with my family and my friends--I have the best family ever, and the most fantastic, true friends a girl could need--but I kept searching for and trying to force a committed relationship.
It didn't happen for a very long time. But, praise God, His timing is perfect. And He has a sense of humor.
See, once I became a senior, I panicked a bit. I thought, if I'm going to meet The One in college, I only have a year left!! But God did some amazing things in my heart, and by the time second semester rolled around, He had taught me about how to fully rely on Him. The need I felt for a committed relationship was gone, because the only committed relationship I will ever need, the only one that will truly satisfy me, is my relationship with Christ.
So here comes second semester. I hadn't dated for about two years, and I was at a point where I loved being single. I was getting excited for the next few years of doing God's will as a single person, and I had even begun to accept the idea that I might never get married, if that's what God wanted.
And then you know what God did? He gave me Robert. I tell you, I think there was a week between my heartfelt prayer thanking God for my singleness and accepting it, and me noticing Robert. He's pretty notice-worthy.
One week after our first date, we were a couple. Two weeks after that, Robert told me he loved me, and I knew I was going to marry him.
So, if you had asked me 15 months ago if I would be getting married soon, I would answer with a truthful--and quite happy--NO. But 14 months ago (to the day, actually), God presented me with a much, much better option.
So, my life has been thrown for a loop. Isn't God funny? His timing and His will, though, are perfect. Christ is still all I need, but I praise God for His goodness in allowing me to share my life with Robert.
I went to William Jewell College, a place lovingly known for distributing MR and MRS degrees. Jewell's tiny, so people's love lives are well-known to everyone, and pretty much everyone assumes that, if you date someone while at Jewell (whether or not s/he goes to Jewell, too), you'll marry them pretty quickly after graduation. I have many friends who prove this assumption correct (four of them are in our wedding party...), and also many more friends who prove this assumption wrong. But, more or less, Jewell's the place where you are expected to meet your spouse-to-be.
Despite this tradition/assumption/folklore, I didn't expect to meet The One while at Jewell. I never really saw myself as a get-married-young type, and I didn't have much patience for dating. Plus, the ratio of guys-to-girls at Jewell when I started was 1-3, and pretty much all of the good ones were taken. I dated a bit in college, but nothing lasted very long and that was fine by me!
At least, that's what I told myself. But deep down...I hate to admit it, but it's true...deep down, I wanted a relationship. I didn't want casual dating, I wanted a commitment to someone who would make me a better person. I, quite frankly, obsessed over a few guys while in college, convinced that they were The One God had for me, and wondering why the relationship wasn't happening. I was very happy with my family and my friends--I have the best family ever, and the most fantastic, true friends a girl could need--but I kept searching for and trying to force a committed relationship.
It didn't happen for a very long time. But, praise God, His timing is perfect. And He has a sense of humor.
See, once I became a senior, I panicked a bit. I thought, if I'm going to meet The One in college, I only have a year left!! But God did some amazing things in my heart, and by the time second semester rolled around, He had taught me about how to fully rely on Him. The need I felt for a committed relationship was gone, because the only committed relationship I will ever need, the only one that will truly satisfy me, is my relationship with Christ.
So here comes second semester. I hadn't dated for about two years, and I was at a point where I loved being single. I was getting excited for the next few years of doing God's will as a single person, and I had even begun to accept the idea that I might never get married, if that's what God wanted.
And then you know what God did? He gave me Robert. I tell you, I think there was a week between my heartfelt prayer thanking God for my singleness and accepting it, and me noticing Robert. He's pretty notice-worthy.
One week after our first date, we were a couple. Two weeks after that, Robert told me he loved me, and I knew I was going to marry him.
So, if you had asked me 15 months ago if I would be getting married soon, I would answer with a truthful--and quite happy--NO. But 14 months ago (to the day, actually), God presented me with a much, much better option.
So, my life has been thrown for a loop. Isn't God funny? His timing and His will, though, are perfect. Christ is still all I need, but I praise God for His goodness in allowing me to share my life with Robert.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Elementary School Lessons
So far, the most stressful part of wedding planning has been the guest list. Everything else has come pretty easily, but the guest list has caused more anxiety and angst than anything else. I blame this entirely on my childhood. More specifically, I blame this entirely on my parents.
See, when I was a kid, I had a birthday party every single year. I didn't invite everyone in class, though (partly because some of them were boys, ew), so my parents had a very strict rule: no discussing your birthday party in front of people who aren't invited!
It was all about being considerate. How rude, my parents would suggest, to talk about how much fun the sleepover will be and how we're all going to see Mary Kate and Ashley Save Their Dad from a Lonely, Single Life Again and how we're going to eat pizza...how rude to talk about this in front of a girl who didn't get to do those things with us! In fact, you shouldn't even mention a birthday party in front of a non-invitee, because what if they ask if they're invited? Saying "No" is humiliating for both parties! (Ha. A pun.) If they ask...they should probably be invited.
Apparently, I internalized this fear of being inconsiderate when it comes to parties, which is why the guest list has been so stressful. It's not like I just can't mention the wedding around people. "What are you doing for your wedding?" "Oh...not much, probably. Just hanging around." And here's the kicker: EVERYONE I KNOW ASKS ABOUT THE WEDDING. If I went by the elementary-school-birthday-party rule of thumb, Robert and I would be inviting roughly 1513 people, not including the total strangers like the cashier at Price Chopper and the vendor on the other end of the phone at work.
I feel guilty when people ask me about my wedding, and in my head, I'm thinking, "You're going to have to imagine the flowers and dress I'm describing now, because, I'm sorry, you're not invited." I realize that some people are just being polite when they chat with me about the wedding. But some people are genuinely interested! They genuinely care! And they genuinely aren't invited!
So let me post this disclaimer to the blogosphere world (i.e. the two people who read this): if you're not invited, it's not because you're not important! It's just that we reached a tipping point on numbers. I mean, really: between my immediate extended family and Robert's immediate extended family, we reach close to 100 people. That's not even getting into great-aunts, -uncles, -grandparents, second cousins, church family, Jewell peers, work buddies, and high school friends.
I guess the point is, I wish we could invite everyone. But we can't. The end.
See, when I was a kid, I had a birthday party every single year. I didn't invite everyone in class, though (partly because some of them were boys, ew), so my parents had a very strict rule: no discussing your birthday party in front of people who aren't invited!
It was all about being considerate. How rude, my parents would suggest, to talk about how much fun the sleepover will be and how we're all going to see Mary Kate and Ashley Save Their Dad from a Lonely, Single Life Again and how we're going to eat pizza...how rude to talk about this in front of a girl who didn't get to do those things with us! In fact, you shouldn't even mention a birthday party in front of a non-invitee, because what if they ask if they're invited? Saying "No" is humiliating for both parties! (Ha. A pun.) If they ask...they should probably be invited.
Apparently, I internalized this fear of being inconsiderate when it comes to parties, which is why the guest list has been so stressful. It's not like I just can't mention the wedding around people. "What are you doing for your wedding?" "Oh...not much, probably. Just hanging around." And here's the kicker: EVERYONE I KNOW ASKS ABOUT THE WEDDING. If I went by the elementary-school-birthday-party rule of thumb, Robert and I would be inviting roughly 1513 people, not including the total strangers like the cashier at Price Chopper and the vendor on the other end of the phone at work.
I feel guilty when people ask me about my wedding, and in my head, I'm thinking, "You're going to have to imagine the flowers and dress I'm describing now, because, I'm sorry, you're not invited." I realize that some people are just being polite when they chat with me about the wedding. But some people are genuinely interested! They genuinely care! And they genuinely aren't invited!
So let me post this disclaimer to the blogosphere world (i.e. the two people who read this): if you're not invited, it's not because you're not important! It's just that we reached a tipping point on numbers. I mean, really: between my immediate extended family and Robert's immediate extended family, we reach close to 100 people. That's not even getting into great-aunts, -uncles, -grandparents, second cousins, church family, Jewell peers, work buddies, and high school friends.
I guess the point is, I wish we could invite everyone. But we can't. The end.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Luke 2:19
"But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart."
I tried to write a post about how I treasure the memory of Robert proposing in my heart, but it was really sappy. It's impossible to put into words the joy I felt when he knelt down, how much I loved the look on his face, how surprised I was and happy, etc etc etc.
I've become one of those girls who thinks the world revolves around her fiance, who thinks no one has ever loved as much as I have, who pities any other woman who doesn't get to marry her fiance. Disgusting, right?
There are already things about Robert that I treasure, already memories that I hide away and look at often...and I'm so excited for the rest of my life, when I get to make more treasured memories.
I warned you it was sappy.
I tried to write a post about how I treasure the memory of Robert proposing in my heart, but it was really sappy. It's impossible to put into words the joy I felt when he knelt down, how much I loved the look on his face, how surprised I was and happy, etc etc etc.
I've become one of those girls who thinks the world revolves around her fiance, who thinks no one has ever loved as much as I have, who pities any other woman who doesn't get to marry her fiance. Disgusting, right?
There are already things about Robert that I treasure, already memories that I hide away and look at often...and I'm so excited for the rest of my life, when I get to make more treasured memories.
I warned you it was sappy.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Update
Here's what we have so far:
- a wedding dress!
- colors: dark blue and silver (and, since it's Christmas, red and green by default)
- two out of five bridesmaids' dresses
- a florist: Gladstone Flowers
- a photographer: Freeland Photography
- an invitation design
- a date
- a plan
Here's what we don't have:
- a church
- a reception hall
- a time
- registries
I'm really excited about a lot of the things we have. My wedding dress, obviously, is one of the most exciting things. All four members of my family went with me last Saturday to David's Bridal, and I was lucky enough to find a $99 gown during the $99 sale. The dress is lovely and fun, but you can't see it until December 21!
I'm also excited about our florist and photographer. Gladstone Flowers is a local florist, and I've ordered and received a lot of flowers from them over the years. They're super nice and super professional, and Matt the designer had some really great ideas for our bouquets. For example, he's going to paint holly silver! I'm inordinately excited about this detail. I just think it's cool that the silver holly will incorporate both the Christmas season and the wedding colors, plus it's shiny. Freeland Photography did Madison and Dane Engquists' wedding, and Robert and I were both really impressed by the results. Mike Freeland is very nice and very talented, and I'm looking forward to having him take our photos!
As for what we don't have...there will be more updates on that later! Eventually we'll figure out what church we're using, and that will answer the question of where the reception will be.
Anyway, wedding planning is going well and going quickly. I'm not taking much time price-shopping or considering many different options: I'm just going with my first instinct. So far, that's gone pretty well.
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